I decided when I was 16 to come out. I could no longer hide the real me, and I was tired of being fake. I knew it would be hard but I had not idea how hard. Within a week of coming out the verbal abuse started. I thought I could handle it, words are words. Within a month the death threats started. Notes, someone just walking down the hall, and even had someone go as far as writing a story on how they would kill me and hide the body. When I tried to express my concern with the school counselor the response I received was – “Every choice you make has it’s repercussions.” I have graduated now, but if you cannot get support from a counselor who should you look to? Luckily I had my family! Support your friends and family.
When a kid goes to school, they are generally concerned with what game they plan on playing at recess. I was more preoccupied with how many times I would be called a “faggot”. The word itself breaks your self-esteem and heart in one swift motion. On top of worrying about being called a name, I had to worry about who would witness my humiliation. 4th, 5th, and the beginning of 6th grade was utter hell for me. Already diagnosed with Manic Depression, being bullied was just the icing on the cake. Also being called “gay” and a “faggot” made me analyze my sexuality at an age that I could have been thinking about other things. There is a lot more to this story than I feel I need to elaborate on.
I grew up fast. However, there is more to my story than name-calling. My story is NOT special. Bullying in any form can cause traumatization. But it also causes growth. I’ve learned what it means to carry compassion. Being able to empathize with others who need a hand to hold or a friend by their side is a gift that I don’t take for granted. My grade school nightmare taught me a lesson that I won’t ever forget. I GIVE A DAMN because as much as I’ve grown from my pain – I don’t think any kid like me should endure that at such a young age. There is a time and place to learn compassion and to empathize, but it shouldn’t be 5 days a week during school.
I give a damn about gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender equality.
I pretty much grew up in small town of about 2,000 people and in this town everyone knows your personal business. I never told anyone in school, even my friends, that I am bisexual. In my town, you can’t even go on a school trip without all the students staring out the bus windows and harassing and yelling out mean things whenever you see a guy and guy or girl and girl holding hands.
I had a close friend of mine who was a lesbian and she got picked on mercilessly by our fellow classmates. This town is so close-minded that it makes me sick! I did have a girlfriend when I was in school but were both very discreet about our relationship since all our classmates were very cruel towards gay people.
If I could go back in time, I would have definitely said, “to hell with this” and came out of the closet because I have never been more proud of myself since I did come out. I am now a happily married woman with a beautiful son, and proud to be bisexual! My advice is that you shouldn’t be afraid to come out live this lie. You should be proud of yourself for who you are and to hell what everyone else thinks!
My name is Ashlee, I am a bisexual and I give a damn about equality, do you?
The other day, my friends and I were talking about our favorite celebrities. It’s known that I’m big on feminism and I’m a lesbian (even though my friends are a tiny bit uncomfortable with the latter one). My friend Kate said that she liked Marilyn Manson and she would totally date him, and I made a face. I told her I liked Lady Gaga, and mentioned very subtly that I found her attractive.
She then responded with a “You’re so gay!”. I told her that well, yeah, I was gay. Kate told me that I was just TOO gay for mentioning that I found a female celebrity attractive.
What, so she can scream how much she loves Manson, and I can’t hint at my attraction to Lady Gaga?
I did not have a real bad experience being openly gay in high school. I was really blessed.
I won’t lie, I faced the usual criticism in high school being openly gay. I had the names called, the bibles brought to me with scriptures read and even praise for being openly gay in high school by some.
The good thing is, I continued being myself despite the names and the taunting. I was asked “Why are you gay?” or “Have you ever been with a woman?” or even “Are you sure you are gay?” but I politely answered the questions. I informed others about the gay “lifestyle”. That made me feel good to correct some of the stereotypes and lies about gay people.
For anyone in high school growing up gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender or whichever, just surround yourself with positive enforcing people. Without the people I use to hang out with in high school, I would not have survived. That is the only real advice I could give somebody.
I am done rambling for now but one day, equality will happen.
When I was a teenager in the 1990s, I realized I needed to come out, but I had no one to talk too. I confided in a friend of mine, who betrayed my trust and told kids at my school. I was verbally abused, physically hurt, and taunted by classmates, so I told my mother. Instead of being supportive, I was told to change my mind about being bisexual. When I didn’t change my mind (because I couldn’t…) she sent me to my grandmother’s home up north where she would “straighten me out.”
Feeling isolated, I found a school support group (called GLOBE) and went to it where I was accepted and welcome. Unfortunately, the guidance counselor, a friend of my grandmother, found out I was in GLOBE and called my grandmother and told her, and I was kicked out of her home and sent back to my mom’s who didn’t want me there so she put me in a behavioral hospital for no other reason than I was “bi”– and to my mother– she rationalized there must be some sort of psychosis causing it.
I hope ALL people, gay or straight, support this cause because NO ONE should have to face homelessness or be harassed, or abused physically and/or verbally, like I was, because they are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender.
The saying is that, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.”
This is so far from true.
Everyday, I hear people use the term “gay” to describe something stupid. I hear them call someone faggot when they’re being annoying. I hear them make homophobic comments that make me want to cry.
There was a day back in October where a bunch of people wore purple in remembrance of the gay teens who committed suicide. I was one of the few people in my school who did.
First period, this boy in my class starts making comments. It’s not a rare thing for him to be a jerk, but it was even worse than normal. He called me a “homofag” and went on about how “homofags” are disgusting. He said things that cut me to the bone because they were so mean. It continued all morning, until my friend got sick of seeing me on the verge of tears and got him to stop.
The next week, school was amazing because he wasn’t there. He got suspended because he was harassing me. But I never felt comfortable in school again, not until he switched to cyber school.
It breaks my heart that things like this–and things so much worse–happen in schools everywhere.
In my high school, being accepted requires you to play a sport, or be in some kind of big activity. The ones who stand in the shadows aren’t noticed unless you’re crazy and have a very outgoing personality, like mine.
However, being loud and hyper when you’re with your friends isn’t too helpful when you’re just walking the halls and by yourself. In my freshman year, I was walking to the lunchroom (we have to walk outside, about 50 feet). I was a little bit late and alone. I got shoved into the brick wall by someone I didn’t see. My head was spinning and I couldn’t see straight. I was lying on the ground and I felt a swift kick right into my stomach. I automatically curled into a ball and covered my face and took the beating.
I reported it and no one did anything, even though I gave them names. Not a single person of the three, I recognized their voices and saw their shoes and recognized them, got anything happening to them. There is still no penalty to gay-bashers at my school. I tried to report it to the police but no one saw anything, apparently. Even my bruises went without any consequence to anyone. I got in trouble because of slander.
Since then I have been trying and trying to make gay-bashing an acknowledged form of bullying at my school, and has the same consequences. It is my senior year now and I’m finally starting to make a difference…
Ever since elementary school I knew I was different, I have never been “one of the guys.” I was always hanging out with the girls, all my friends for the longest time were girls. I really started to see a change in who I was in 5th grade and my parents had just gotten a divorce shortly after the birth of my little brother.
Elementary isn’t what you want to hear about, you want the middle school and high school years. I am currently a Junior in high school, in middle school I got called names and I acted like it didn’t bother me because I thought they were just messing around. The year I realized that I liked boys was the most AMAZING year of my life.
8th grade my friend had a Halloween party and she invited one of her friends from her old school named Josh. My friend Todd and I got there a little early, we went and hung out in her room with Josh while she got ready with her friend in the bathroom. They were doing their hair, I sat down on the bed next to Josh. You know that feeling you get when you’re around someone you have feelings for? Like it is just you and that person and you just want to stay there forever.
I wrote a poem about my ex-girlfriend that I miss very much. She’s happy with someone I set her up with and I can’t be with her due to my mother’s disapproval. My mom didn’t stop and think about how she made me feel. I call her feathers because she had rainbow colored feathers in her hair when we met. And she was such an amazing girl and I’m sad we can’t be together because of lack of support on my mother’s end. I wrote a poem. I slam poem about her. I want my poem to get out there for people to read.
I Call Her Feathers
She’s been bullied since she was in middle school for making her own decisions
She reminds me of the ones who stood for their rights in the 1960s
She’s not as strong as Rosa Parks
But she speaks
“Don’t Say That’s Gay”
It hurts her feelings
She has a right to life
It’s her freedom of movement to love whomever
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Hatred. Derision. Insults. Threats. Harassment. Assault. It’s estimated nearly 90% of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth have been verbally or physically harassed or assaulted at school.