Ever since elementary school I knew I was different, I have never been “one of the guys.” I was always hanging out with the girls, all my friends for the longest time were girls. I really started to see a change in who I was in 5th grade and my parents had just gotten a divorce shortly after the birth of my little brother.
Elementary isn’t what you want to hear about, you want the middle school and high school years. I am currently a Junior in high school, in middle school I got called names and I acted like it didn’t bother me because I thought they were just messing around. The year I realized that I liked boys was the most AMAZING year of my life.
8th grade my friend had a Halloween party and she invited one of her friends from her old school named Josh. My friend Todd and I got there a little early, we went and hung out in her room with Josh while she got ready with her friend in the bathroom. They were doing their hair, I sat down on the bed next to Josh. You know that feeling you get when you’re around someone you have feelings for? Like it is just you and that person and you just want to stay there forever.
I wrote a poem about my ex-girlfriend that I miss very much. She’s happy with someone I set her up with and I can’t be with her due to my mother’s disapproval. My mom didn’t stop and think about how she made me feel. I call her feathers because she had rainbow colored feathers in her hair when we met. And she was such an amazing girl and I’m sad we can’t be together because of lack of support on my mother’s end. I wrote a poem. I slam poem about her. I want my poem to get out there for people to read.
I Call Her Feathers
She’s been bullied since she was in middle school for making her own decisions
She reminds me of the ones who stood for their rights in the 1960s
She’s not as strong as Rosa Parks
But she speaks
“Don’t Say That’s Gay”
It hurts her feelings
She has a right to life
It’s her freedom of movement to love whomever
I walk in school everyday and all I hear is “Faggot, Faggot, Faggot,” but I don’t understand how people can judge a book by its cover. But, everyday I walk to school with a big smile on my face.
A lot of the people in my school are either gay or bisexual. When I realized that, I thought it would be the right time to come out that I am bi. People accepted it and I was happy about being able to be me. But then I met my ex-boyfriend. He treated me good at times. We did have our falling outs but in the end I fell in love with him.
Little did I realize that was a mistake. I had told him that I was bi but what I didn’t know was that he was disgusted by it. He never told me. When we finally broke up for good, I realized that every time we dated, he cheated on me. With a different straight girl every time.
One day I heard him talking with his friends. I heard my name so I thought I’d listen. He kept saying “You know my ex Kiara? Dude, that b***h is disgusting! She likes girls. I don’t know why I ever dated her. She’s fat and ugly. No wonder she likes girls. She can’t get any guys.” His friends kept saying that I shouldn’t be allowed in school, that gay and bisexual people shouldn’t be allowed to live. And it wasn’t only him. I heard other people calling me and my friends fags and other s**t. People threw stuff at us, tripped us down the steps, and pinched and poked at us.
I realized then that I was being blindsided by how I loved my ex-boyfriend. My pain wasn’t worth it. I stood up against it. All I have to say is DON’T TAKE IT. Push your rights. I did. ♥
I am 21 years old and I am gay. I have always known that I was gay, but didn’t know how people would react when I told them. My sister was the first person I ever told. She told me she knew, she was just waiting for me to tell her myself. So, I thought that was easy, so I would come out to everyone. It was easy, everyone said they always knew, they were just waiting for me to tell them. I feel so much better that I can be myself and don’t have to worry about what people think, because I am who I am. If you cannot accept that, then its okay, because I will be me forever.
I live in a country where it is illegal to be gay/lesbian/bisexual/transgender. I go to school everyday, and everyone who knows me knows I’m bisexual. Some of my friends made fun of me initially, and poked fun about it on occasion, as they did not actually believe me in the beginning. I’m 17, and I’ve been out of the closet since I was 14, having realized it a couple of years prior to then.
Over the last few years, however, those who did not believe me have come to accept it as a fact, and I am proud to say that I have not lost a single friend, or been rejected by anyone, yet. My mother knows, as well as my brothers, sisters and cousins, and I’m waiting for the right moment to tell my dad and the rest of the older generation. But I can honestly say that I am content, and sure, I may have things that make me unhappy occasionally, and even make me question why god made me the way I am, but I have never been bullied for my sexual orientation in or out of school.
Coming up, I wasn’t quite sure of what it was to be gay, lesbian, bisexual, or anything of the sort. I was brought up in a very religious background so I was always told that being gay was an abomination. I started becoming interested in females at the age of 8 and I was very sure of it. I just didn’t have the label of being “bisexual” at that point.
It started to grow on me and make SO much sense and finally once I hit my freshman year of high school I began to accept it. It seemed as though EVERYONE in my high school was gay! I felt that I fit in. But, I didn’t fit in in the one place that counted, myself. Also, I felt I wouldn’t be accepted at home. I took the time to sit down with my brother (whom I call my twin) and told him straight up, “big brother, I like guys .. and girls. I’m bisexual.” My brother said, “so, you’re my little sister. Your preference does not make me love you any less.”
It began to seem as though just having HIM accept me was more important than anything. But we’re joined at the hip (haha). During the summer after I reached 16, I took the step to tell my mother. My mom didn’t care too much either. She’s more accepting, but she doesn’t acknowledge it too much. But I’ve yet to tell my dad. But just being able to tell those two, I’ve never felt SO great about myself. Seeing that this site is up, and seeing so many of my favorite people being part of the LGBTQ community (Anna Paquin I love you!) I could never ask for any more than this. (:
I wrote this story about 6 years ago during my real coming out process and due to recent events reread it and remember how far I’ve come but how much I went thru… It really does get better!
“The Hate Within” By Toby Browning
It was just an ordinary January day and I was expecting to have an uneventful morning with my dad. My dad is 74 years old and, though he has 7 children, I’m the only one that goes to visit him. I’m his baby… but there is a huge generation gap because he is 46 years older than me. My dad is very proud of me, but he always worried about me.
He couldn’t understand why I got divorced and I would never talk to him about it. After listening to advice from my family and friends I decided not to tell my dad that I was gay. Everyone told me it would be better if I didn’t tell him. I went over to my dad’s house on this nothing special Sunday in January to visit with him. He and I were hungry so we decided to go get us some breakfast. I went down the road that I’ve been down a hundred times before but when I got to the bottom of the hill there was something going on.
My story begins in the middle of last school year…
I began to realize my own sexual orientation when, a boy I’d only seen in passing at school, named Michael, came out as bisexual. He was actually dating a close friend of mine at the time (who was a girl), and he was quite popular. While sitting at lunch one day, I was sitting next to a few friends and friends of friends, and suddenly, one of the boys at my table shouted across the table “MICHAEL! I hate you! I hate you now!”… I asked him “Why did you say that? Why do you hate him?” His reply was simple – “He’s gay!” I asked him – “So what?”
This basically resulted in a back and forth argument involving the Bible and fact – and asking if I was gay. I wasn’t so ready to let that information out, particularly in light of the argument I’d just had. And, then came the most annoying, most contradictory bull cocky I’d ever heard – they started discussing how lesbians were “hot”…
Who I am is not important. What I stand for is, I am a bisexual teenager. I am almost 17 and a junior in high school. I am open about who I am. I have a girlfriend who I love. In my school I see how many of my friends are stared at with such hatred and it breaks my heart. I see how other people like me are treated and its wrong.
How many of you have stood there and wished you could change the way people look at you? That you wished they could see you for who you are, not which sex you like? Well, I have because I took a jump to be with my baby. Not only is she a girl, but she is also black and I am white, so not only do people hate us for being strong enough for being together, but also because our skin is a different color.
I have a gay friend who I have had to talk out of suicide many times because he is picked on ruthlessly! Parents, kids it’s time to change the way we look at people like me and my friends. It’s time to give a damn, so do you?
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Hatred. Derision. Insults. Threats. Harassment. Assault. It’s estimated nearly 90% of gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth have been verbally or physically harassed or assaulted at school.