Give a Damn about LOVE

Aug 04th, 2011 11:09 AM By Carol

I am in love with the kindest and most beautiful woman. We’ve been together for more than two years working overseas on cruise ships, but it has come the time for us to settle down on land and start living the rest of our lives. She is from the States, I am Peruvian and we’d rather live in the US than in my country, since we can access to a higher quality of life and provide a better future for our children when they come.

We are both on vacation; I just came back from the States where I was spending time with her. It was the first time that we have lived together for so long in a house like a real family and it broke my heart having to leave her behind. She has found a good job back at home and I love her enough to accept that this is a great opportunity for her and if we can make it through the long distance relationship, it will be good for our future.

I am going back to work in a few days and even when we have promised that this is not going to break us apart and we will be able to see each other from time to time, I can’t stop having nightmares at night… I don’t wanna lose her. She is the one!.

I wish the laws change soon enough, I hope that my voice and the voices of so many others like me can be heard soon enough so we can fulfill our dreams of love and happiness- the same dreams that other bi-national straight couples can achieve.

Please give a damn.

Thank you,

Carol

Why Do I Have to Leave My Country??

Aug 04th, 2011 11:06 AM By Susan

As the title says, why do I have to leave my country to have a life with my fiance? America is supposed to be the greatest country in the world, and yet I have to choose between my country and another just for equality in marriage!!!

My fiance Karen and I have been together over 2 years now, patiently waiting for the ability for me to sponsor her for a green card… an ability that all heterosexual couples have, yet I do not. I am treated as a second class American with barely any of the same rights “normal” couples have. And that is a real shame. It’s a shame that Ireland and England and 17 other countries guarantee equal rights for LGBT couples, yet my own country, the Mighty USA, does not.

I have to now find someone to take care of 2 of my 3 cats because I cannot afford to take all 3 of them with me… I have to say goodbye to my 70 year old mother who just recovered from breast cancer and needs me to be HERE for her, my family… my friends. I have to sell almost everything I own because I can’t take it all with me and storage is too expensive. Why? Because my country is run by bigots. People who are so caught up in their hatred of anyone not like themselves that they work hard to keep those people from having the same rights they do.

How sad is that?

I want more than anything to be able to begin my life with my fiance… let’s work together to try and make that happen for couples like myself and Karen all over the world! Stand up! Speak Out! GIVE A DAMN! I do

Thanks for reading my story,
Susan
Oak Forest, IL

Why Is There So Much Hate?

Aug 04th, 2011 10:27 AM By Kai

Hi there. My name is Kai, and I’m a girl who feels that I should be in a boy’s body. But this story doesn’t have anything to do with me, but with my uncle, Mark. My uncle Mark is probably the nicest guy you will ever meet on this planet, that, and he bakes like he’s a gourmet chef. There’s apparently something wrong with him though, according to everyone outside of my family. He’s gay.

Now my question is; Why should this matter to anyone else? He is living his life to the fullest right now in his house with his friend Allen, and Allen’s partner Marni. Now, these are the 3 best men on the planet, bakers, hard workers, and they put everyone else before themselves. But what bothers me is that my uncle can’t marry who he loves because of our state’s laws.

Everyone should have equal rights. Whether they be gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgender, or anything else, they should be treated the same as every other person on this planet. There shouldn’t be a law saying you can’t marry who you love, because then that would pretty much be like making divorce illegal for straight men and woman.

Everyone deserves happiness, no matter what.

Shackles with Two Locks

Aug 04th, 2011 10:19 AM By Aurore

I move uncomfortably. My mother reaches to soothe me. My father grips her arm tight.
I am a lesbian. My mother is a coward. My father is not a good man.
I try to find oxygen. My mother tries to hold back tears. My father tries to go get his gun.
I am a lesbian. My mother is a coward. My father is not a good man.
I disdainfully live in a small town. My mother stubbornly lives in her little world. My father lives in a kingdom he dictates.
I am a lesbian. My mother is a coward. My father is not a good man.
I ran from that state. My mother stares blankly at her decided fate. My father is full of only hate.
I am his hate. My mother seeks me in other states. My father has a lonely fate.
more…

The 700 Club

Aug 04th, 2011 10:15 AM By Tess

My name is Tess, I’m 18 and I’m gay. It never really mattered much to me if the people around me accepted me, because I was ok with who I was whether they were or not. Being called “dyke” or “lesbo” always just kind of rolled off my shoulders in high school. I never flaunted my sexuality in school, if people knew, they knew, but it wasn’t announced to everyone I met, it sometimes took people by surprise when they found out, but their reactions never bothered me much. If they didn’t want to get to know me because of my sexual preference then that was on them.

Well, everything people and society said never affected me, until one night I was laying in bed on vacation in Myrtle Beach, I was flipping through the channels and landed on ABC Family, and the 700 Club was on, I got up to go brush my teeth, and as I was brushing my teeth I heard the topic of “gay marriage” come up on the TV, so I listened. And what I heard will always be in the back of my mind… “you wouldn’t let someone marry their dog, so why should we let same sex couples get married?”… Being compared to bestiality? It was ridiculous! And it made me realize that people really are that narrow-minded

Since my eyes were open to these things, I started noticing it more and more, at home, school, and in church. I’d hear the preacher lump homosexuals in the same category as rapists, murderers, and adulterers. And I hated it. And I was ready to do something about it. Everyday I try my best to break the mold of being “gay”, so people can see that we aren’t all the same, we are individuals and we deserve to be treated as equals in life.

WE ARE THE FUTURE

Aug 04th, 2011 10:11 AM By samantha

Hi

My name is Samantha and I am 19 years old.
As I was growing up, I used to hear “children are the future”,
so if we are the future, why haven’t we done something?

From 18 on, we have a choice, and a voice
so why don’t we stand up, and tell these “older”
people who don’t have any common sense, what we really think.

If no one has noticed all the stubborn people who are
so narrow minded
old and almost ready to die.
so its our time to move in and make some changes
we are more open minded about everything,
so why don’t we stand up for ourselves,
if we get shot down,
we can stand back up easier and come back harder.

don’t be afraid of the unknown,
go at it head on!

we can make a change,
we have a voice
so let’s do something
instead of sitting here and watching!!!

we all have rights,
we should have the right to get married
to whomever we choose too.

No Limits on Who You Love

Aug 04th, 2011 10:10 AM By april

I live in a town in Illinois that borders Iowa, so I am close enough that my partner and I can be married. Even before I “came out” I always believed you have the right to love and marry no matter race, sex, religion, etc. I wonder how all the people who are fighting this would feel if they were told your white and you can only marry a white person, or your a Christian and you can only marry a Christian. I judge no one and no one should judge me. My 7 year old tells everyone she has two mommies and that its ok that we are gay. My 7 year old understands more than grown adults.

First Love

Aug 04th, 2011 10:02 AM By Michael

I work as a disease intervention specialist. The main group we work with are gay men exposed to HIV. When I first started this job a lady slightly older than me asked me if I was HIV positive, which I am not. Due to her experience, she assumed that all gay men that came to work in this field were positive… Needless to say I am still angry months down the road, how could she automatically assume something without knowing ME.

Well, I didn’t date until I was 20, just shy of 21. I did not date in high school, never went to a party, not even a prom. I was confused and ashamed of who I was. I was scared to tell my Korean mother and my Jewish father. I was scared to thrown out… So I internalized all this and decided that it would be unfair to date anyone until I was me totally sure.

I met a guy at my job that was several years older than me. He was the first gay man I met. He teased and flirted knowing that I was not out, not even to myself. He convinced me to accept who I was and became a big brother to me. He helped me lose weight (about 100 lbs) and become more confident. It was with him I discovered who I was.
more…

HRC: HOUSE LAWYERS EXPLAIN WHY DISCRIMINATION AGAINST GAYS AND LESBIANS IS OKAY

Aug 03rd, 2011 02:23 PM By Admin

The following is the Human Rights Campaign’s blog HRC Backstory:

On Monday, lawyers for the House Bipartisan Legal Advisory Group (BLAG) filed their latest arguments using your taxpayer dollars to defend the discriminatory Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) in federal court, in Windsor v. United States. As you’ll recall, in that case, Edie Windsor is challenging the hefty tax penalty she faces as she inherits her late wife’s estate because of DOMA, a penalty that would not apply if her spouse had been a man.

For the first time, BLAG lawyers have put pen to paper to explain why laws that discriminate against gays and lesbians should not be subject to a more thorough review – better known as “heightened scrutiny” – by the courts. When deciding whether to apply heightened scrutiny, courts typically consider two factors: (1) whether there is a history of discrimination based on the characteristic and (2) whether the characteristic is relevant to one’s ability to participate in or contribute to society. They sometimes also consider (3) whether the characteristic is immutable and (4) whether the group is particularly vulnerable politically. The BLAG’s brief addresses all these factors, making statements that are simultaneously homophobic and unconvincing.

The brief touches very lightly on the first two factors, the ones that courts consistently weigh, arguing instead that all four factors are must be taken into account. Citing an LGBT historian, the BLAG lawyers claim that there is no substantial history of discrimination against gays and lesbians, as “a consequence of the fact that homosexuality – as a distinct category or class – was not even recognized in the United States until the late nineteenth century.” Apparently, in their minds, because it took so long for a courageous few to begin identifying themselves as gay or lesbian –in the face of the overwhelming risk of losing employment, having custody of children torn away, being ostracized from friends and family, and even becoming a victim of hate violence or spending years in prison— there is insufficient history of discrimination to support heightened scrutiny. They go on to contend that “how quickly things are changing” for gays and lesbians should also count against us. And on the second factor, the BLAG lawyers simply skirt the tough question of whether sexual orientation bears any relation to ability to perform or contribute to society. Despite it being a core factor in the heightened scrutiny analysis, in three short paragraphs their brief contends that it is “hardly the sum total” and simply reiterates their belief that Congress had good reasons to enact DOMA.

Most of their brief is spent, instead, trying to convince the court that sexual orientation is not immutable and that gays and lesbians have inordinate political power. First, the BLAG lawyers argue that, because there is some variation in the ways terms like “gay,” “lesbian” and “homosexual” are defined and understood, they “are amorphous and do not adequately describe a particular class.” In addition, their brief questions immutability because sexual orientation is not clear at birth (citing an expert who stated, “[L]ooking at a newborn, I would not be able to tell you what that child’s sexual orientation is going to be”) and because some experts have observed that some people’s sexuality is more fluid than others. Notably, the brief ignores both the broad body of scientific evidence, professional opinion and popular belief that gays and lesbians cannot change who they are and the so-called “evidence” put forward by anti-equality forces that reparative therapy can change sexual orientation.

But more than a third of the entire brief is spent dwelling on one point – that gays and lesbians are not politically powerless. The BLAG lawyers catalogue recent advances, like the repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” and marriage equality in New York, as evidence that our community has “wielded considerable power” in the political arena and elsewhere. They cite the work of HRC, the Victory Fund and other groups as proof positive that “gays and lesbians have achieved and continue to achieve substantial political success.” They brush aside the fact that in state after state, laws and constitutional amendments have been adopted that deny the dignity and equality of our families, and that gays and lesbians do not enjoy even basic protections against employment discrimination in twenty-nine states. While our recent progress in undeniable, the difficulties facing LGBT families across the country remain enormous. What makes this argument even more shockingly callous is that political powerlessness is not a necessary factor in the heightened scrutiny analysis. The Supreme Court adopted heightened scrutiny for discrimination based on gender in 1971, more than half a century after women won the right to vote and several years after they were included in the Civil Rights Act’s employment protections. And in a more recent case about race and heightened scrutiny, in 1995 the Court concluded that a federal program that favored minority-owned businesses should be reviewed under strict scrutiny, even though that race-based classification disadvantaged a clearly politically powerful majority.

I have no doubt that Edie Windsor and the ACLU team representing her will take these ridiculous arguments apart. And I hope that the BLAG lawyers are right about one thing – that our society has changed enough for gays and lesbians that Judge Francis will not allow a law based in animus toward us to stand.

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Would Love to be Able to Marry My Lover

Aug 02nd, 2011 06:32 PM By Marie

I met Melissa about 4 years ago and we have been wanting to get married, but because it’s not legal in the states that we live in it is not possible. We do not wish to marry in a different state than where we reside. We have been waiting 2 whole years to be able to legally wed and live happily ever after. Maybe one day soon it will be possible to wed my one true love in front of my family and friends. We both look forward to that day with anticipation, until that time we wait.